Home, and an open letter of apology

There are so many things about being home that I love that I can't even begin to list them all. I couldn't stop grinning as my flight came in yesterday afternoon. Paul was at the airport to pick me up, as has become custom for my trips home. I think it started when I was dating Zac long-distance and Paul decided he needed to hear how the trip went before anyone else did. (Since it's all Paul's fault that I ended up with Zac in the first place.) Now I just assume that each time I arrive home at MSP it will be Paul, alone, picking me up from the airport and driving me to my parents' house. It's a nice chance to talk to him for an uninterrupted 20 minutes.

I got to my parents' house, took a quick shower and got ready for Christmas 2009 vol. 2. My cousin and her husband are also in town for the holiday, they moved to New York City at the same time that Zac and I moved to Hawaii, and so everyone was together once again. The house was packed, I couldn't talk to everyone as much as I wanted, and the kids (Lincoln, and my other cousin's two daughters, Maddie and Hazel) made an enormous amount of noise. I basically just laughed, amused and pleased, through the whole evening.

So this is where the apology needs to placed:

To all of my Minnesota friends, whom I love dearly, I will probably not be able to see you on this trip. As much as I would love to spend a day (or two or three) with each of you, catching up and enjoying each others company, my time here is short and I've found that I want to devote most of this trip to family. We're planning an old-school Ayers/Erickson trip to the cabin (a.k.a. the Dome) to celebrate New Year's, there are a few birthdays that need to be observed, and I simply need a family re-charge. I've missed Megan. A lot. And I know she's missed me. A lot. And we need some sisterly bonding time. And that's what it takes - time. And on this trip in particular (only seven days) I don't have a lot of it.

Next time I'm in MN I plan on making it a friend-friendly trip, with time for socializing, wining and dining. Next time I'll be calling people ahead of time, booking hanging-out timeslots. You have been warned. Also, consider that I live in a tropical paradise and have a spare bedroom plus a fairly flexible work schedule. I would only need a few days' notice to provide shelter for you if you were to, say, find a cheap plane ticket to Honolulu.

I've been desperate for some tradition this year and tradition is hard to come by in a fairly young marriage, living in a fairly new location. I was so content last night at Christmas. Supper, presents, dessert, laughter. And the promise of a few days at the Dome with the fireplace roaring, playing in the snow, lighting sparklers and then playing cards while we thaw out is just what I need to experience some family traditions. It's not that I don't want to see you all - I truly do - I just have a crowded priority list this time. I promise that it won't be long til you hear from me or see me again.

You know that feeling you get when you're being pulled in a hundred different directions and it stresses you out so much that you're just miserable about everything? I didn't want that to be me on this trip, wanting to spend time with everyone and not being able to do it, thus feeling overwhelmed on the whole trip. So I decided on the plane ride here that I needed to make a tough decision and that decision meant limiting my goals for this round.

You guys know I love you. My world is better because you are in it. Much, much better. A phone call, a blog entry, a Facebook status, an e-mail - you guys make me laugh, cry, and feel cared about. I hope you all can understand and forgive me for making you wait (however many months) until I get to see you again. My friends are never far from my thoughts and always near the top of my list of things I am grateful for.

With love,
Kate