Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Class is in session

Approximately 35 weeks along . . .

Two weekends ago was all baby, all the time.  We started out on Friday taking a tour of the Labor & Delivery (L&D) unit at Navy Medical Center San Diego (NMCSD).  It was an opportunity to see the facilities and meet some of the staff that may be around when it comes time to deliver.  NMCSD seems like a nice enough place and the staff seems to genuinely enjoy their jobs.  As someone who has never been admitted to a hospital, or really even spent much time in a hospital visiting others, I was surprised at how impersonal it seemed.  Yes, they tried to decorate L&D to make it more relaxing and "homey" but it still felt . . . sterile.  In more ways than one.  I understand that it's the nature of hospitals, but the antiseptic smell that permeates everything doesn't make me feel "healthy" or "natural".  There's really nothing soothing, relaxing or healing about chemical smells, fluorescent lighting and the constant sound of electronic monitors going off.  At least the actual birthing rooms have lighting that's less harsh.  I can certainly see the appeal of a home birth or those high-end birthing centers after visiting NMCSD.  Yes, having all of that technology and specialists around in case something goes wrong is great but it certainly seems to come at a cost.  Cost of what, I can't quite articulate.  I'm sure I'll have other things on my mind when the time comes to deliver and the subsequent 24 hours, but I can understand why moms would want to leave the hospital as soon as possible after having a baby.

On Saturday and Sunday Zac and I attended a birthing class at a different San Diego hospital.  I discovered much too late into this pregnancy that many birthing classes are anywhere from six to twelve weeks long.  Truthfully, I'm glad we went with the two-day class.  I've talked to other friends who have taken the longer classes and frankly the additional hours of class work are mainly devoted to practicing breathing and relaxation.  While that's what some people want, neither Zac nor I would have enjoyed that many sessions of the same thing over and over.  Our two-day class hit the major topics: stages of labor, breathing, pain relief and epidurals, Cesarean sections, breastfeeding, postpartum care, plus a few others. 

There were 10 other couples in the class, all of us first-time parents.  It was a friendly group where everyone seemed to have a pretty good sense of humor about the absurdity of what we were all about to go through.  Unfortunately there was one woman in the class who was the quintessential Negative Nancy.  Apparently every single one of her girlfriends had nightmarish delivery experiences.  Everything that could go wrong with late-term pregnancy and delivery had happened to the women in her life.  She seemed to relish sharing each and every horror story about evil doctors, bitchy nurses, rare complications and gruesome happenings to moms and babies.  Luckily most of the people in the class didn't pay her fear-mongering much heed.  By the end of the two days, most of us simply rolled our eyes each time she started in on one of her stories.  I felt bad for the nurse who taught the class - she did the best that she could to contain Nancy's negativity.  On the one hand the nurse had to acknowledge that yes, sometimes there are complications and, yes, sometimes you don't always get along with the staff on hand, but she adeptly countered that most of the time things go smoothly and that you can always request to have another doctor or nurse.

It was certainly a worthwhile two days.  I was moved to tears on at least three separate occasions, all of which were caused by video clips we watched in the class.  At the beginning of the first day we watched a clip from Bill Cosby's epic 1983 comedy routine "Bill Cosby, Himself."  He spent a good 10 minutes or so describing the experience that he and his wife had for the delivery of their first-born.  I was almost afraid I was going to go in to labor simply from laughing too hard.  Everyone in the class was roaring.  Bill Cosby really is a comedy genius, and I would seriously consider watching his routines while I work through labor.  (Although I'm not sure how my laughing would interfere or aid my breathing.)  The other two times I got a little misty was at the end of two hospital-produced video clips relating to child birth.  In one of them the father spoke of his feelings about being there for the process and meeting his child for the first time.  He talked about how proud he was of his wife and how quickly he fell in love with his child.  In the other video, the new moms talked about the experience of childbirth and how, regardless of how they had their child (c-section, natural, epidural) they felt an amazing sense of accomplishment and joy.  It was hard not to have my hormonally super-charged emotions get the best of me and so a few happy tears rolled down my cheeks.

At this point I'm awaiting my 36-week appointment to see where I'm at.  I believe at this point I start going in every week to check on things.  I suppose Zac and I are as ready as we can be.  There's a place for the baby to sleep, I've got a pair of breasts and there's some formula in the cabinet if breastfeeding doesn't work out.  There are diapers and drawers full of clothing awaiting the wee one.  We also have running water and soap.  That seems to cover the main requirements of feeding, clothing, diapering and cleaning the child, so whether Baby arrives in one week, three weeks or five, we're set up to welcome a baby into our home.  There is only so much classes can do for new parents - most of what we will learn will be on our own, through trial and error.  But I am optimistic that we will try our best, and that's a good place to start from.

So for now we spend most of our evenings enjoying the quiet and relishing sleeping in on the weekends, luxuries that will soon be a thing of the past.  A sense of calm has descended on the house.  Most of it is probably attributable to the Christmas tree which twinkles happily in the living room.  It's hard not be relaxed and happy when bathed in the glow of Christmas lights.  Zac's work schedule is slowing down for the holiday season and we're now able to spend more time together, which is the best gift of all - especially this year.  Baby will be here before we know it.